Satire: What to Know About the Winter Olympics
Andrew Rosin ’25 presents a non-comprehensive guide to understanding the Winter Olympic Games.
Andrew Rosin '25
Satire: Students Return from Break No More Motivated Than Before
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 comments on student burnout and jokes about students’ desire for another break.
Satire: Attendance Rate Increases by Zero Percent After Daylight Savings
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 notes that the recent shift from daylight savings is not going to be much help in getting students to class on time.
Event Policy Revived, Students Excited to Party for First Time This Year
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ‘25 covers the new Student-Hosted Event Policy and conveys students’ excitement to start partying this year, now that they have the college’s approval.
Satire: Amherst Eliminates Legacy Admission Preference to Make Room for Athletic Admission Preference
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 celebrates Amherst’s recent departure from legacy-preferential admissions as a brilliant step toward getting more athletic recruits on campus.
Satire: Amherst Celebrates 200th Year of Being Students’ Second Choice
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 pokes fun at Amherst’s prestige as it celebrates its Bicentennial through imagined interviews about the college’s role as “the nation’s most prestigious back-up school.”
Satire: New ACPD Report Finds ACPD May or May Not Exist
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 covers ACPD’s latest investigation, an investigation into the very plausibility of its own existence.