Satire

Satire: Amherst College Student Becomes New “Survivor” Host

Staff Columnist Vaughn Armour ’25 is not writing this week.

Satire: Amherst College March Madness

Managing Sports Editor Joey Supik ’27 walks through the results of the colleges’ elimination tournament.

Satire: Ranking Teams Based on Violence

Managing Sports Editor Joey Supik '27 lists Amherst’s sports teams from least to most violent.

Satire: Early Predictions for the 2024-25 Season

Ahead of the fall season, Managing Sports Editor Joey Supik ’27 forecasts each team's outcome for the previous year.

Satire: Summer Research Assistant Application

Satire: New Flashy Table at Val!

Staff Writer Hannah Feng ’28 and Contributing Writer Isha Patel ’28 revel in the luxury of Val’s brand new granite table.

Satire: Purple Banners Gone. I Don’t Know Which Dorm is Mine.

Staff Writer Hannah Feng ’28 jokes about the removal of the purple banners from the First Year Quad.