Satire: Ranking Teams Based on Violence
Managing Sports Editor Joey Supik '27 lists Amherst’s sports teams from least to most violent.
Satire
Satire: Early Predictions for the 2024-25 Season
Ahead of the fall season, Managing Sports Editor Joey Supik ’27 forecasts each team's outcome for the previous year.
Satire: Summer Research Assistant Application
Satire: New Flashy Table at Val!
Staff Writer Hannah Feng ’28 and Contributing Writer Isha Patel ’28 revel in the luxury of Val’s brand new granite table.
Satire: Purple Banners Gone. I Don’t Know Which Dorm is Mine.
Staff Writer Hannah Feng ’28 jokes about the removal of the purple banners from the First Year Quad.
Satire: Amherst College Student Found Studying in a Rail Trail Bush
Satire: Staff Writer Hannah Feng ’28 interviews an Amherst student who, desperate for a quiet study spot during midterms, was found studying in a bush along the Rail Trail after failing to find space in the campus library.
Satire: Amherst College Unveils New Stand-n-Stay Dining Option in Keefe Campus Center!
Read all about the newest innovation to the student dining experience: the brand new Stand-n-Stay option in Keefe.