Satire
Satire: Amherst Mantra Advocates for Canceling Students
Managing Editor Liam Archacki ’24 investigates surprisingly uncontroversial takes published in a mysterious new paper circulating around campus.
Satire: FAQs About the New Residence Hall Reservation Policy
Staff writer Andrew Rosin ’25 covers the new Student Hosted Events Policy, showcasing its unintentionally humorous aspects.
Satire: What to Know About the Winter Olympics
Andrew Rosin ’25 presents a non-comprehensive guide to understanding the Winter Olympic Games.
Satire: Attendance Rate Increases by Zero Percent After Daylight Savings
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 notes that the recent shift from daylight savings is not going to be much help in getting students to class on time.
Event Policy Revived, Students Excited to Party for First Time This Year
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ‘25 covers the new Student-Hosted Event Policy and conveys students’ excitement to start partying this year, now that they have the college’s approval.
Satire: Amherst Eliminates Legacy Admission Preference to Make Room for Athletic Admission Preference
Satire columnist Andrew Rosin ’25 celebrates Amherst’s recent departure from legacy-preferential admissions as a brilliant step toward getting more athletic recruits on campus.